STORiES. REFLECTiONS. MUSiNGS. CONFESSiONS.


16 May 2010

Musing when my Brain is at Rest

 
Love yourself.
first

Accept yourself
all of you

even the bits of you that
society does not accept

that you don't want to 
accept 

as you


especially love those bits - be honest about them, 

yes, there they are

those are the bits that cannot be canned

contained

made to obey

conform
some of those bits might be smoothed into the character, essence of you - honed by time and wisdom

other bits are rough,   still, can't seem to...


don't hide those bits, they are you, they may mellow, 
but they will do that in their own time

when they're ready
(if they ever will be)

let them be, 
allow them to be
accept that you are not even close to perfection
you will have greater tolerance of other's rough bits when you do

love yourself now

because no one will do it for you, not all the time

we are all strangers to eachother
our known bits only form wholes 
because of the stories 
that people use to glue the bits together 

so you are loved, in part.

maybe you only love yourself in part...the brain-dominated-you

not you, inner-you



listen to yourself

you are not your brain
that is not the you of YOU
your brain is a tool to channel things

look beyond your thoughts, open the curtain behind them

you will find yourself sitting

calmly

you will note the calm

because it will surprise you
that you are not this rollercoaster of emotion and reaction and response and endless thought, self-critique, self-hatred, judgement, fear, anxiety

that is your brain, not you
observe it
thinking

look down on it and observe it doing what it does

can you? 

you can

you will then understand that you are separate from it

I think therefore I am
is enlightenment thinking, 
a time where thinking on one's own was cherished as a new right

 eras since have passed into new ones, yet we still prize thinking, 
we think too much now
for we think that is enlightened
we think that is who we are


strange, 
even you are strange to yourself...
...to find out that you have been there all along
while your brain pretended it was you

and you understand now that the rough bits are really strange bits from the deep down 'you' that your 'brain-you' doesn't know what to do with
so they become transformed by the part of your
public, socialized, brain-you
into an awkwardness, an incomplete manifestation...
because of your brain's resistance, society's resistance
they feel rough, unnacceptable, 

and you can't get rid of them
 
for they are you, 


look at them apart from your brain's haze of interpretation

look at 

you

you behind your brain you

you are beautiful
and those bits that are misinterpreted are there, in beautiful form
spend time with that real inner self beyond the brain

let yourself out
for a walk around the block
so to speak

try that newly discovered self out
and listen to it


it takes practice


now love you
all of yous : inner-you and brain-you
even if there are rough patches
because the brain-you is a hard habit to break
you will find yourself thinking worrying fretting judging
like you used to
relax
observe your brain being busy with itself
don't get involved



love your lovely you -  listen to you
shh
it is in a different language
listen
 


take your 'you self' out for a walk...
your brain can just follow behind


for once

14 comments:

  1. yeah so true, just like this forwarded sms msg I received the other day: you should love the person who has been with you through the most trying times. who tells a lie just to make you feel better, who never stops believing in your weird complicated excuses. who faces the consequences of your wrong doings. who encourages you to stand after every downfall, who manages to be the strongest even in your weakest moment.love this person for this person is all you got in your darkest hours. want to know who? face the mirror, that person deserves your love too.

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  2. "take yourself for a walk..."wow what a beautiful poem... I have just realized that that is what I am going to do. I need to take a break, take myself for a walk into my writing world and accept and love all the bits of me.
    Thanks Marcella, let's keep in touch, please
    XXX

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  3. sounds like you were at my yoga retreat this weekend. :)

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  4. Hi Mie - nice to connect with you all the way in Vietnam - have you made that career decision yet?

    Lorenza - how pregnant are you with that book? labour pains? Must be difficult to figure out how much of yourself to put in your writing...does all of yourself fit with what the publishers/market wants?

    Michele - how was that yoga retreat anyway?

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  5. Nice writing and very true. Yeah, a walk would be nice, I enjoy walking with myself. Lovely.

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  6. Lovely writing and a 'walk with yourself' how true but rarely done. Thank you for the gentle reminder

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  7. Hi Marcella, Beautiful poem. Ahh the brain, such a prominent figure in our lives, always trying to tell us who we are. And it's so true, we have to leave it behind sometimes to find out. I am loving the not so wonderful bits of myself these days..glad to see that you are too.

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  8. As I always seem to walk with my brain leading the way, I thought walking with me leading my brain would be interesting...takes practice in meditation though...hard to get it into a "street-worthy" skill :)

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  9. Back again. To pass on an award to your blog, if you are up for it. It's there to collect over at my place.
    Maria

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  10. This is truly uplifting! What a beautiful message in your poem!

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  11. Hello friend - left you alittle something to hang on your wall- please pop by my place to snag it! Props and love!
    Tony Anders

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  12. Marcella, I especially love the part about being honest about the parts of you that are hard for others (or ourselves) to accept, because they won't conform. Yay!

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  13. This is beautiful. It had a very calming effect and I'm glad that you commented on my blog so that I could find yours.

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  14. So beautiful. Now......to actually do it....

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